Fictionary: Kryptonheight

Fictionary is a column showcasing beauty- and dating-related words that don’t exist, but should.

Famously 6’5″ Vince Vaughn

Kryptonheight (clearly based on Superman’s famous natural weakness) refers to my condition of being rendered powerless against the allure of a man 6’2″ plus. Though the affliction lay dormant after nearly a decade in New York City, the teacup man capital of the world, it never really goes away. There’s just something about no glass ceiling re: my heel height that gets me every time.

Example: At the Sundance Film Festival, I find myself SLAIN on a regular basis thanks to the kryptonheight of the scruffy, corn-fed down-clad skiers and extreme winter sport enthusiasts.

Example 2: In 2010 at the Sundance Film Festival, 6’3″ Ben Affleck walked into the Entertainment Weekly suite, where I was hanging out, silencing the room immediately with his combo of kryptonheight and charisma. The brand reps I’d traveled with and I then had to talk about him for the next EIGHT HOURS.

I swear when I’m in the company of a gentleman who can’t simply order his jeans on the Internet and can’t JUST borrow a coat when at a friend’s house, Chris Isaak’s (6’1″, BT dubs! META) “Wicked Game” becomes the soundtrack of my life.

Are you affected by kryptonheight?

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2 Comments Fictionary: Kryptonheight

  1. mamavalveeta03

    A definite YES since I’m MARRIED to “kryptonheight”–My hubby is 6’4″! (and in an ironic twist: The old ladies at our church are in love with him and calling him “Clark Kent”…lol!)


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