Helen Gurley Brown Dead At 90

Helen Gurley Brown on her first day as editor-in-chief of “Cosmopolitan.” 

Champion of single ladies everywhere Helen Gurley Brown passed away yesterday. The legendary former editor-in-chief of “Cosmopolitan” believed in hard work, maintaining a svelte figure, enjoying sex and calling people “pussycat,” much like a real life Golden GirlsSophia Petrillo. She got married at the age of 37 during a time when being unmarried at 23 made you an old maid. She called her husband, David Brown, Lambchop. It was he who insisted she write her famous tome, “Sex And The Single Girl,” a read anyone who’s ever flirted with a married man must pick up. She effectively walked the line of sophistication and utter trash effortlessly–I can think of no one else who can. Here, some of my favorite quotes of hers.

  • “Beauty can’t amuse you, but brainwork—reading, writing, thinking—can.”
  • “Never fail to know that if you are doing all the talking, you are boring somebody.”
  • “Money, if it does not bring you happiness, will at least help you be miserable in comfort.”
  • “I hope I have convinced you / the only thing that separates successful people from the ones who aren’t is the willingness to work very, very hard.”
  • “Nearly every glamorous, wealthy, successful career woman you might envy now started out as some kind of schlep.”
  • “I’ve never worked anywhere without being sexually involved with somebody in the office.”

Helen Gurley Brown was truly a dame. Here’s to continuing her legacy, mouseburgers.

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